Fun and Motherhood - My experience

Mother helping baby walk

Last night was the count down to the New Year, waiting excitedly for 2018 to start.

When I was younger, that meant a big get-together with lots of friends and family, music, chatter and laughter. Waiting up till midnight for the countdown.

Now as the mother of a 15 month old little girl, my perception of what is "fun" has changed.

I no longer want to be in the middle of big groups of loud people or even go out late. These are not 'sacrifices' I'm making because I have a child, it's because I have changed.

"Alone-time" for me is lying in bed on my phone after she and daddy fell asleep at night. It's not something I have to leave them to find.

Motherhood has changed me and it's not something I resent or patiently wait to return to. I don't think, "Once she's older I can have my life back and do the things I love".

I no longer love my prior life, I love my new life, my life with my daughter, my life as a mother and wife.

Last night was a lot of fun for me! We visited my aunt's house and spent the night there with my parents and grandmother. We were only 8 people in total and it was wonderful.

We had snacks that my daughter could also enjoy, nothing fancy, just good food. The toys I packed for her were scattered across the living room. She entertained us all with her funny faces and new words she is learning.

We left way before 12 and we tucked her in bed between us after she fell asleep on the ride home.

I got annoyed at the noisy neighborhood with their loud music and talking because I wanted my little girl to sleep peacefully.

In my pre-motherhood life I might have envied their parties but not now, now my idea of fun is spending time with my little girl who is already growing up too fast.

When contemplating accepting an invite or visiting a new place I think of her and if she'll enjoy it. It brings me joy seeing her play and explore. She's on the rocks-phase now, every time she sees a rock she picks it up.

I've never been a person that needs "grown-up" time or time away from my husband or daughter. We have planned "date-nights" in the past but then end up taking her along because we love spending time with her. Even if that is 24/7.

I don't get annoyed when I have to share my snacks with those little hands, have to receive the small squares of torn toilet paper every time I go to the bathroom or redo the laundry on the line 4 times because she keeps "helping".

"Alone-time" for me is lying in bed on my phone after she and daddy fell asleep at night. It's not something I have to leave them to find.

I was warned before motherhood about all the "negatives" but they honestly only excited me and sounded wonderful. Spending every day with your favorite person in the world, watching her learn and her brain develop.

I actually get way more sleep now as a mother than I did before. She wants me next to her in bed so I'm forced to stay here and sleep. That's a good thing for a night-owl like me.

Sometimes I get asked if I don't get bored at home or if I don't need to work to have "something for myself". I do have "something for myself", I made a human, my human and I raise her.

If you are asking a stay-at-home-mom of she gets bored then you clearly have no idea how much she actually does. Like I said before, I redo the laundry on the line 4 times, because allowing a child to explore and learn while tending to the house takes a lot of time and effort.

Yes sure I can scold her and tell her to leave things alone but what good will that do her? She's 15 months old and she can now actually hang small items of clothing on the line perfectly, she learned something and enjoyed herself doing it.

These things are what I find fun. Seeing her learn and doing laundry with her. Having cozy nights in or taking her on date nights.

I don't know if I just have an unique way of thinking about it or if there are other mothers that feel the same way. I just don't feel that I'm missing out on my life by being a mother and I think my life is a 1,000 times more exciting after becoming a mother.

I started my new year by lying in bed next to my sleeping little girl and eating chocolate. It was FUN.